Our attitude influences our lives more than you might think. Optimists are healthier, happier, and more likely to live happily ever after.
Cold gusts of wind, rain and cloudy skies make up a bleak picture of autumn. But if we look at things from a different perspective, we suddenly discover that this season offers us a multitude of possibilities: we go more often to the theatre and concerts, we meet more often with family and friends, we rediscover the joy of the home, with a cup of wine drunk at the mouth of the stove.
Like almost all the events in our lives, autumn also has two sides. It’s up to us which one we choose to see. As Winston Churchill once said: “The optimist sees in every obstacle an opportunity, while the pessimist sees in every opportunity an obstacle.” In these few words, he was able to perfectly define the essence of optimism (in Latin, “optimum” = “best”): unshakeable confidence in a happy outcome.
But there are downsides. In our society, people with problems enjoy more attention than those who always have a smile on their face. Perpetually well-willed employees risk arousing the suspicion that they are doing too well and not giving their best at work. And anyone who remains confident, even in complicated situations, is immediately labeled naïve and inexperienced. Unfairly – because optimism is, in many circumstances, a valuable personal resource capable of ensuring our success. Studies conducted with the participation of third-aged people and breast cancer patients, students, nuns and prisoners of war prove it. They all came to the same conclusion: people more confident and more confident in life do not let themselves be brought down by failures and find their balance more easily after suffering a blow of fate. They are more resistant to stress, compared to pessimists, have a stronger immune system, better blood sugar and cholesterol test results, and recover faster after difficult surgery, such as bypass surgery.
Moreover, a study by researchers at Harvard University shows that optimists face a lower risk of death from a heart attack or stroke. And their colleagues at the University of Zurich have noticed that the way we evaluate our own health is directly reflected in life expectancy. So those who answer “very well” to the question “How do you feel in general?” will live longer than those who answer only with “good” and considerably more than those who harbor negative feelings about their health.
Specialists believe that genetic baggage is only slightly responsible for our ability to be optimistic. Rather, we are influenced by what was passed on to us in the early years of childhood. Whoever has been taught in the parental home to work hard, believing that his efforts will be rewarded, is rather inclined to believe that he can make his own fate. The social environment also puts its mark on our personality. Americans, for example, are a particularly brave and optimistic people. Confidence in the future has been innovated since childhood, by virtue of the principle that anyone can start washing dishes in a restaurant, so that one day they become a millionaire.
The good news: if in adulthood we see the glass half full or, on the contrary, half empty, this is by no means a fatality with which we must resign ourselves. Positive thinking can be learned, just like a foreign language – by practicing continuously. “It’s indeed a difficult process, but people have the opportunity to enter new information by putting it in the brain’s data bank until the end of their lives,” the experts say. There are various strategies, with which new connections can be created, which will strengthen the better the more frequently they will be used.
Someone who’s in an unfavorable situation and thinks that, anyway, he can’t change anything has already lost. To break the deadlock, he must analyze the situation, look with maximum determination in it for a positive aspect and weigh its significance. Due to this deliberately constructed perception, the circumstances will then be assessed much more positively.
Do exercises of imagination
Every night, write down in a notebook the beautiful things you experience during the day. These can be simple details, such as a look that has sent you a message of sympathy, a ray of sunshine in the window or a happy situation. Our brains are gullible. It is difficult for him to discern between images of external and inner reality. That’s why, when we watch a sad movie, we grieve ourselves, even we cry. And vice versa: the brain secretes hormones of happiness, when we remember with as many details of certain things that we enjoyed, because he takes this representation seriously, as if it were reality itself.
The diet of weight loss failed, you didn’t manage to take the exam, the first meeting with someone you met recently was a failure? This does not mean in any way that you are forever condemned to be fat, coddly to notes or deprived of a companion. Such thoughts are burdensome and take away your energy. Even if the balance sheet does not currently live up to your hopes, you may be more successful the moment you make a new attempt – discover a more suitable diet, prepare better for the exam, or fall in love with someone else. For everything in the world there is an alternative.
Take an interest in others
Imagine you met an acquaintance. After the usual exchange of lines: “How are you?” – “Okay”, the dialogue ends. Only if the interlocutor is in trouble, we continue to ask him questions. But specialists teach us that we should ask him how his business is going, even when it works. Which makes the other one feel good. This will be passed on to our own state of mind, that eventually we will both be well-disposed. The fact is also confirmed by an American study, conducted over a period of two decades. The likelihood of us being happy increases by 34% if the neighbor in our immediate vicinity is also happy, whether we’re talking about the office or the block where we live.
Of course, there are also situations or moments that can have nothing in common with the good mood. Fear, anger, sadness and despair are also part of life – including the life of an optimist. “When we feel that a huge negative wave has come upon us, sweeping everything in the way, the first thing we need to worry about is limiting the damage,” the psychologists advise. Here we can benefit from the support of friends, family, but also a therapist. The important thing is just not to be paralyzed by negative feelings: “Especially in times when we have to reflect on so many things, a fundamentally positive attitude helps us not to block ourselves.” Which is not to say that we are asked to look at the world through pink lenses, but only to perceive it essentially positively, accepting it with all its shortcomings.
Small test: Badly disposed or depressed?
Each of us has days when he doesn’t feel comfortable. But a depression extends beyond two weeks and includes symptoms such as difficulty concentrating, memory impairment, loss of appetite and lack of courage. In general, it is believed that depressives are primarily sad. But typical is rather apathy, which goes so far that they become unable to get out of bed.
Are pessimists more prone to depression?
Basically, any man can have depressive states. But indeed, those who see and perceive everything negatively have a greater tendency to develop a mental lability, ultimately leading to depression.
What effects does the bad autumn weather have on our mood?
In part of the population, lower sunlight negatively influences mood. It’s about what in specialized language is called seasonal depression. It can be combated with phototherapy or with a holiday in warmer and sunnier countries. And anyone who can’t afford an exotic vacation should at least overcome their inertia and get out in the air. A quarter-hour walk on the lunch break would be enough for the body to provide the necessary light. That’s what any employee can do where they work.
What else helps against bad mood?
Studies show that movement has an antidepressant effect. It’s enough 15 minutes of physical activity, for example, a walk or bike ride. Preparations with ringing extract, in an appropriate concentration, give good results in mild and medium forms of depression, as well as in seasonal depression. Stress-induced indispositions are useful, especially combined formulas containing valerian. For psychic balance and harmony, the olive and the tail of the kite (cala) are also recommended.
How to think positively?
Statement means a short and simple statement, a positively worded sentence, which contains the purpose that is intended to be achieved. In the field of psychology, affirmations are an already established form of therapy. They help to gradually blur some beliefs (negative) until they cease to act. Frequent repetition eventually changes the person’s attitude in a positive sense. Therefore, the mode of action of an effective statement is inseparably linked to the acceptance and confirmation of your own life – in other words, to the desire to rebalance your state. physical, economic or spiritual. “Magic formulas” can make a significant contribution in this direction.
Mobilize your subconscious
Since the human subconscious refuses denials, the basic principle of an assertion is as follows: develop a positive, presently placed formulation. For example, don’t say, “I don’t want to smoke anymore.” It’s preferable to say, “I breathe easier.” Words like “no,” “no,” or any other negation only create an autosuggestion to direct your attention. to that unwanted state.
Repeat the statement, up to 30 times a day, for several days, so that the subconscious focuses on this life situation, formulated by you. at the present time. Essential to achieving success is also the affectionate attention you turn to the content of the string of words. Load with joy the thought of “Breathe easier”. Thus, it can be obtained with a short utterance of it, an effect as powerful as with a prolonged repetition.
One essential detail must also be noted: the statement always refers to one’s own self. Therefore, it is never repeated aloud in the presence of someone else, but in silence, at most in whispers – that is, in the moments when you want to improve a personal life situation.
Making up a statement
When you want to make your own statement, you need to take a few points into account.
Always describe the present you want
The subconscious tends to execute exactly what you think, it believes you and takes you seriously. Therefore, if you use a form like “I want to make a decision”, not much will happen. You won’t get anything with the sentence “I’ll make a decision”. Even if, from an energy point of view, it already has more force, it still remains an image projected into the future. Instead, the wording “I’m making a decision now” comes directly into the present. For starters, try out the sentences, pronounce them out loud. Also try to perceive how your body’s position changes. while you’re saying them.
Use exclusively positive formulations
When you choose a personal statement, make only short sentences that already anticipate your goal. Besides, you’d better form this skill in terms of your behavior. of everyday life. For the more frequently you use positive formulations, the more positive situations you will be given. (I do, dreg, I can, I think, win…)
Choose sentences you can believe in
An old Chinese proverb sounds like this: “Even the longest journey begins with the first step.” Therefore, set your goals in such a way that they are credible to you. Try to feel if the sentence you have chosen truly resonates in your soul. and creates a near-joy state for you. If not, rephrase it. In case, for the time being, you don’t think of a better formulation, resume the attempt later. Sometimes the best ideas come to us just when we’re not looking for them on purpose, for example while we bathe, mow the lawn or do the dishes.
Form short sentences
The statements aren’t novels, so they shouldn’t contain more than ten words. The shorter and more accurate they are, the better. Here are some characteristic examples below.
* Purpose – you want to quit smoking, maintaining your body weight.
Right – “I’m free.” This sentence declares that you are free on all levels and do not replace one addiction with another (such as sweets). Because that’s how many ex-smokers are wrong, which is how they get fat fast.
False – “I don’t want to smoke anymore”. The consequence would be: I still smoke, because the subconscious has suppressed the denial from the sentence.
* Purpose – you want to feel more self-assured in the community where you work.
The third millennium drug: OPTIMISM
Right – “I feel safe and protected in any situation”. Or: “I feel like a member with equal rights. Every person in the community is a part of me.”
False – “I’ll feel good about the community”. The sentence is about the future, so it will have no effect whatsoever.
Dosage of statements
To break away from old patterns of thinking and behavior, you need, first of all, patience. After all, they were not born overnight, but appeared and strengthened over the years. Therefore, repeat the chosen statement up to 30 times for three weeks, only in thought or whispering. Then change the wording.